Keyboard Karen

Professional complaint letter templates for the discerning customer who knows their rights, understands their worth, and will be speaking to a manager.

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Karen-ism Glossary

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"I know the owner"

A claim of personal connection that is almost certainly exaggerated or completely fabricated, deployed to suggest that consequences for the business are imminent.

"I'm never coming back"

A dramatic declaration of boycott, typically made at least once per visit to the same establishment.

"This is unacceptable"

The verbal equivalent of highlighting text in red. Indicates that something has crossed an invisible line that exists only in the speaker's mind.

"I've been a customer for X years"

An appeal to tenure that suggests loyalty should override all policies, logic, and basic mathematics.

Remember

"The squeaky wheel gets the grease, but the entitled Karen gets the manager."

— Ancient Retail Proverb